We often think of sex toys in terms of solo masturbation, but if you're not incorporating one of the best sex toys (like vibrators or dildos) into your sexual repertoire with a partner, you could be missing out on a world of fun.
"Sex toys can enhance all sexual relationships―with yourself and with a partner, confirms Dr. Jess O'Reilly, sexologist and relationship expert at sex toy site Lovehoney. "The mere presence of a sex toy often leads to new conversations about everything from desires and fantasies to boundaries and hesitations." And, as we all know, honesty and vulnerability enhances all relationships. This is why sex games, such as sex card games, are also incredibly effective at deepening emotional and physical intimacy.
Sex toys can also bring a bit of spiciness to an otherwise bland sexual routine. If you're in a long-term relationship or if you're just looking to learn more about what makes you and your partner feel good, toys serve as an excellent (not to mention fun) teacher. "The novelty of a toy can also heighten passion, as it can offer a simple reminder to break your routine and try something new," Dr. O'Reilly agrees.
Still, whether you've never used a sex toy with a partner or just need to expand your inventory, it can be difficult to know where to begin—there are a lot of sex toys for couples out there. For that reason, we've rounded up some of the very best sex toys to bring to bed with your partner for your deepest connection yet.
How to Bring Up Sex Toys With Your Partner
Many people become nervous or even defensive when it comes time to talk with a partner about bringing toys into the bedroom, but this initial conversation (or conversations) doesn't have to be so anxiety-inducing, so long as each partner is honest, empathetic, and open to listening.
"When broaching the topic of introducing toys with your partner, it’s important to talk about what and how you are feeling," says Ashton Egner, communications manager at sex toy brand Kiiroo. "The key for any couple is communication. If you don’t talk about your sexual wants, needs, and desires your partner will never know that you want to incorporate toys into your sexual relationship."
Furthermore, it's important to be introspective about why you want to use sex toys during partner play. "Explaining why you think introducing toys into your relationship will ignite things in the bedroom will provide your partner with a better understanding of your desires."
Still nervous about bringing the topic up? Consider doing a bit of research before you put your thoughts and feelings out in the open. "Educating yourself with articles or podcasts from other people who have been through the same situation will help you go into the conversation with a background on why you may be feeling the way you do―decreasing the chances of your partner feeling negatively toward your request," Egner affirms.
How to Get Started
So you've done your thinking, performed your research on how to use a vibrator, and had a wonderfully open conversation with your partner, which begs the question: What now?
"Once you’ve established what exactly you’re craving with your partner, the next step is to choose the type of toy that will please one or both of you," Egner suggests. "The first place to start is with something simple such as a vibrating toy, and if you like the sensation, start to look at the different types of toys available on the market today. We all have different bodies, and we all have different sensations that tease and please us. Once you are able to communicate that desire, it will be easier to start experimenting from there."
Deals on Sex Toys for Couples
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The Best Sex Toys for Couples
- Best Clitoral-Stimulating Sex Toy for Couples: Dame Eva
- Best Penis-Stimulating Sex Toy for Couples: Lovehoney Juno Rechargeable Music Activated Vibrating Love Ring
- Best G-Spot Stimulating Sex Toy for Couples: LELO Titani 3 Deep Rose
- Best Sex Toy for Couples for Mutual Penetration: Happy Rabbit Rechargeable Vibrating Strapless Strap-On
- Best Anal-Stimulating Sex Toy for Couples: We-Vibe Ditto
- Best Nipple-Stimulating Sex Toy for Couples: Nipplettes Vibrating Nipple Clamps
- Best Kinky Sex Toy for Couples: Sportsheets Enchanted Starter Set
- Best Sex Toy for Couples for Fingering: Lovehoney BASICS Finger Stimulators
- Best Sex Toy for Couples Overall: We-Vibe Tease Us Set (Moxie & Bond)
Clitoral-Stimulating Sex Toys for Couples
If you have a clitoris, you're no stranger to the intense sensations that touching it can produce. It is, after all, the only human organ built first and foremost for pleasure! It's no wonder, then, why so stimulators and even penetrative toys are made with the clitoris in mind.
The most popular of these clitoris-focused toys are vibrators, but remember that not all vibrations are alike, and not all toys stimulate the clitoris in the same way! Egner encourages couples to explore what makes them feel best, both in terms of vibration type and where they like to be touched, before finally settling on a toy. "Once a couple has figured out if vibrations are something they enjoy, then they can start to explore the more premium sex toys that can be used during foreplay, or while being intimate," she says. "The possibilities are endless, however, it’s important to figure out what is best for you, your partner, and your relationship."
And, as you'll see from the options below, when it comes to types of toys, the possibilities are endless, ranging from vibrating panties to remote vibrators and everything in between.
This all-star vibrator can be secured onto your vulva so that it stimulates your clitoris without getting in the way of penetration. Win-win. One reviewer even said that it gave his wife what she called "the longest sustained orgasm of her life."
Pros: woman-owned brand; great for solo and partner play; hands-free
Cons: can be challenging to keep in place while in certain sex positions
Customer Review: "Oh YES! Love it. Sometimes you need a little touch on there to keep it in place but it’s fantastic! Highly recommend." -Dame
This little gem comes with an optional tether and attaches to one's fingers with ease. According to reviews, it's also small and quiet enough to be carried around and used with subtlety. Press it against your partner's chest, genitals, rectum, or other erogenous zones to add a bit of spice to your finger fun.
Pros: quiet; great for all experience levels; great for multiple parts of the body
Cons: some users wish there were more than three vibration settings
Customer Review: "Comfortable to use, without getting in the way, semi-quiet so no super loud, annoying & distracting buzzing sound. Soft/smooth, glides nicely, great quality, and 3 varying speeds for just the right amount of pleasure." -Dame
Designed "to enhance the sensations of sex for couples," this innovative rabbit vibrator sits partially in the vagina, while the other half of it sits on your clitoris. This way, once the vibrations get started, both you and your partner can feel the waves.
Pros: waterproof; made for mutual pleasure; made for dual stimulation; can be used for solo masturbation; eight vibration settings; waterproof
Cons: some users say there's a learning curve to it in the beginning
Customer Review: "Big fan of this device. The product description is correct when it says your partner can be inside you while the device is inside you too, which heightened our pleasure. I also recommend using it during anal." -LELO
Get subtly sexy with this wearable vibrator, which comes complete with a pair of lace panties designed for the device to fit right in. Dr. O'Reilly fully endorses the use of such toys, encouraging couples to "consider using a wearable toy to tease your partner throughout the day by sending small vibrations – a playful preview of what’s to come."
Pros: expert-approved; subtle; great for adding sexual variety; discreet; three vibration speeds and 10 patterns
Cons: vibrations not strong enough for some users
Customer Review: "The vibrator is entirely waterproof and fully rechargeable via a simple A/C adapter. The toy has a silky smooth silicone exterior with a matte finish. The controls are intuitive and easy to use, to deliver moderately strong, buzzy vibrations throughout the toy. Despite it’s strong motor, it’s surpassingly quiet, and would be a great toy for a gal living at home or in a dorm. Although the vibrations weren’t powerful enough for me, they would be wonderful for anyone who’s new to toys or prefers a lighter to moderate, buzzy vibration." -Slutty Girl Problems
Penis Play Sex Toys for Couples
Sex toy articles tend to focus on vibrators and clitoral stimulation, but there are toys that stimulate penises, too! Many provide simultaneous stimulation to the clitoris, but, even if you're not a penis-owner, it can be just as much fun to watch your partner have a good time as it is to have a good time yourself.
The soft plastic rings in this set are meant to enhance stimulation to the penis, and are great for people who want to give some love to the base of the penis without opting for deep penetration. Users recommend using a water-based lubricant with these toys for hours of "slippery fun."
Pros: made for mutual pleasure; can make penetration more comfortable
Cons: contains latex, so unsuitable for those with latex allergies
Customer Review: "Texture is softer and more pleasant than expected. Colors are as seen in photo. Reversible for more or less sensation. Wife had as much or more fun than myself." -Lovehoney
This ring, small enough for beginners, fastens to the base of the penis and has an extension that stimulates the clitoris so that when it vibrates, both partners reap the benefits. Dr. O'Reilly recommends cock rings as a great option for couples that are just beginning to explore the world of sex toys. Such rings, she says, are "inexpensive and available at most drugstores. These can be used while having intercourse—regardless of the genders involved."
Pros: expert-approved; made for mutual pleasure; 20 customizable vibration functions
Cons: made of silicone, so not compatible with silicone-based lube
Customer Review: "It's the best vibrator I (male) had, among more than a dozen different brands and styles. The power and vibrations are great, I mean super on point. Most other vibrators have patterns that suddenly get too fast or seem all over the place, or some have patterns that are dull, but this one is a gem. A huge bonus is also it's noise level, some vibrators, even the bullet ones, make a lot of noise with much less power. This one makes noise exactly as you would expect and never gets loud." -Lovehoney
Dr. O’Reilly highly recommends this music-activated toy. She says, "Music (and sound in general) has the capacity to significantly affect mood. The contagion hypothesis suggests that we mimic what we hear in our environment, so when you listen to music that evokes a sense of relaxation, adventure or closeness, it follows that you might feel more of the same."
Pros: sensory experience; expert-approved; submersible; easy to clean
Cons: relatively short battery life (40 minutes)
Customer Review: "I think I am quite open minded and knowledgeable on sex toys that are on the market but never knew something like this existed...This bullet, sits inside a very flexible ring that feels comfortable and not like it could do damage if left on for a while. As it’s closer to the shaft and you can actually feel it, it gives the male more pleasure than most on the market. What makes this one stand out is the accompanying remote control. Yes I know, quite a few come with remote controls for you to chose settings etc, but this one - you switch it on, make sure it’s paired and place it next to your music and let it work wonders on you." -Lovehoney
Did you know that bestselling sex toy brand We-Vibe sells sets that are specially made for long-distance couples. In addition to this set, which comes with a toy for a penis and one for a clitoris, they also have clitoris-clitoris and penis-penis sets. And, of course, all of their toys can be controlled via mobile app, so you can participate in your partner's pleasure no matter where you are.
Pros: can be controlled via mobile app; made with long distance couples in mind; two toys for the price of one; over 10 vibration intensity levels; comfortable
Cons: some users find the vibrations loud
Customer Review: "The size is perfect, and it comes with a little magnet to keep it in place. I had a hard time pressing the button while using it, but then I just used the app to control it and problem solved! It’s super quiet, so you can wear it anytime/anywhere which is my favorite!" -We-Vibe
Strap-On Sex Toys for Couples
Strap-ons can be used in a myriad of situations, but are especially popular among queer women as well as men who enjoy anal stimulation (many men, of all sexual orientations, do!). And we have good news: If you have a vagina and are interested in a strap-on option that pleases both you and your partner simultaneously, there are a number of products out there for you and your person to explore to your heart's content.
For those who want to keep it simple, opt for this sleek, basic product, which comes in both black and matte purple. One enthusiastic reviewer said this was her favorite strap-on, that it was easy to use, and that she even bought a second one so she could keep it at her partner's house!
Pros: easy to use; easy to clean; lightweight; only one piece; comes in two different sizes; safe for p-spot and g-spot stimulation
Cons: made from silicone, so cannot be paired with silicone lube
Customer Review: "I honestly don't know why this strap-on doesn't have more reviews. It's been the best strap-on I've ever used. It's so easy to pull off and on—no complex harnesses. The dildo is the perfect size and feels good. I even bought one to keep at my partner's house. We both love it!" -Babeland
If you're not into the S&M look of most strap-on harnesses, opt for a delicate, lacy lingerie option like this one from Lovehoney, which one very satisfied customer said "felt like lingerie but naughtier."
Pros: aesthetically appealing; easy to use; subtle; soft, stretchy fabric; crotchless
Cons: dildo/vibrator not included
Customer Review: "In an effort to please my man, I have purchased several different strap-ons. These are the most comfortable, versatile and sexy option we have tried. We can do anything and everything in these comfortably. Absolutely LOVE these!!!" -Lovehoney
Many people enjoy the intensity of double penetration―including one ecstatic reviewer, who calls this toy the "magical orgasm wish giver"―and this product provides just that and more with both its hardware and its vibration settings.
Pros: free of latex and phthalates; highly rated; flexible; water-submersible
Cons: made of silicone, so not suited for use with silicone-based lube
Customer Review: "As we both enjoy anal play we thought this would be worth a try so that it would be more pleasurable as you get two for one! It’s comfortable to wear and easy to use, just add a bit of lube and away you go. Can be a bit fiddly for the first use but you then get the hang of it and unlocks levels of pleasure you didn’t know there was!" -Lovehoney
This toy does everything: Traditional strap-on capability, g-spot stimulation, and clitoral stimulation all at once, and that "hits all the right spots" for both partners, based on reviews.
Pros: waterproof; 15 vibration modes; has a travel lock; free of latex and phthalates
Cons: some users say it's difficult to manipulate the clitoral head
Customer Review: "I initially tried this on myself. It’s really REALLY good and one end can be held securely like a handle type. Tried both with vibrations and without and both were fantastic. When using with my partner it took a bit of working out to get the angle right so it stayed in the ‘giver’ but it’s easily and quickly done. Every body is a different shape so it’s great that it’s easy for us to switch it when we want want to." -Lovehoney
Best Remote-Controlled Sex Toys for Couples
In a long-distance relationship, or just looking for more sexy reminders of your partner when you two are apart? "Using remote-controlled sex toys is a great opportunity to explore eroticism throughout the day, regardless of your location," says Dr. O'Reilly. "They offer novel sensations and inspire playfulness which in turn creates stronger relationships because it improves openness and exploration."
If you're new to remote-controlled toys, O'Reilly suggests exploring control dynamics. "Especially for those accustomed to routine, remote-controlled sex toys are a great opportunity to experiment with new roles...Take turns teasing each other and exploring new levels of anticipation." She also suggests getting creative with time. "Remote-controlled toys really allow you to play with the building anticipation and prolong your partnered experience."
Use this ring during sex like a traditional cock ring, or incorporate it into foreplay to drive your partner crazy before the main event. Dr. O'Reilly suggests that, with toys like this, partners "play with intensity settings, starting off slow and building to a climax. You may also want to tease by depriving them of vibes as you edge them to heightened pleasure."
Pros: three vibration speeds and seven functions; expert-approved; hands-free; made for mutual pleasure; free of latex and phthalates; submersible
Cons: relatively short battery life (one hour)
Customer Review: "I prefer toys me and my husband can use together. This is amazing. It not only is rechargeable which is phenomenal. It can also be used as a constriction ring with a bullet or a bullet alone. So my husband can play with me and then we can play together. We both very much enjoyed it." -Lovehoney
According to reviewers, this love egg is great for those who like moderate penetration, but prefer clitoral action. With a relatively short insertable length, the egg comfortably sits in the vaginal canal without reaching all the way in the way that many dildos and g-spot vibrators do.
Pros: waterproof; nine vibration modes; free of latex and phthalates
Cons: relatively short charge life (60 minutes)
Customer Review: "I love love love this! It just got delivered today and I just had a sneaky little me session, and I have never felt such an intense orgasm ever!! It’s standard for the to have three to six orgasms in one session, but holy God my whole body was literally shaking from this!!" -Lovehoney
Think: Remote g-spot stimulator, but for your rectum. Reviewers consistently laud this toy for the intense pleasure and ease of use that it offers to those who are just beginning to explore anal stimulation.
Pros: great for users of all experience levels; gender-inclusive; great for long-distance play
Cons: occasional connectivity/app issues; made of silicone, so not compatible with silicone-based lube
Customer Review: "This product is fun for both partners being both the wearer and the controller. Especially exciting when used in public. Design is easy to insert and comfortable to wear for longer periods of time. Recommend using a good long lasting lube such as Sliquid Silk when inserting. The device is less filling that others but makes up for that in vibrating power. Vibrating power and different patterns are amazing." -We-Vibe
Let your partner control the vibrations of this G-spot massager using an app of their phone for an easy, interactive long-distance sex session. Scores of reviewers laud this toy for its subtlety, saying that it can be worn and used "whenever and wherever," and while I can't condone masturbating at work, I can endorse this fun addition to any couple's sexual repertoire.
Pros: two-year warranty; waterproof; two-hour battery life; 10 vibration modes; quiet vibrations; easy to use
Cons: occasional connectivity/app issues; made of silicone, so not compatible with silicone-based lube
Customer Review: "My wife's favorite toy. Great level of vibration with a good variety of patterns. Great to use internally or on the clitoris. Has just the right level of vibration to be very orgasmic. Easy to charge." -We-Vibe
Best Nipple-Stimulating Sex Toys for Couples
There are countless people who can attest to the joys of sexual stimulation to the nipples, and this anecdotal evidence has been validated in a number of studies. In a particular 2011 piece by researchers at Rutgers University, researchers found that, in a sexual context, nipple stimulation sends sensory signals to the same part of the brain that processes stimulation to the clitoris, vagina, and cervix.
If you already love the feeling of your partner touching your nipples (or vice versa), check out some of these nipple-focused toys that can bring your exploration to the next level.
These nipple suckers are great for beginners, and have a fun added twist: They change from purple to bright pink as things heat up, and reviewers assure us that they fit on comfortably while providing just enough suction to remain firmly in place.
Pros: affordable; color-changing; free of latex and phthalates
Cons: suction strength may be quite strong for beginners
Customer Review: "I absolutely love this, have always been a big fan of nipple play! These are sensational and gentle which is perfect if you are not looking for too much. I love the fact they change color—also just a cute little perk." -Lovehoney
If you're looking to play with different temperatures and physical sensations, check out this hydrating, stimulating lip balm made from natural ingredients. It's 100 percent body safe, so it can be used to enhance stimulation to the nipples, genitals, and any other body part (including lips!) explored during foreplay. Reviewers also love it for its lip-plumping qualities and enjoy wearing it in and outside the bedroom.
Pros: easy to apply; hydrating; body-safe
Cons: none found
Customer Review: "Absolutely love this! Definitely worth it in & out of the bedroom. Love the way it plumps & moisturizes my lips & my boyfriend loves it too!!" -Amazon
This looks a bit like a pump for breastfeeding, but do not be deceived! The toy has seven different settings that can be used during foreplay to heighten sensitivity, or during sex to intensify the moment. According to users, the product provides a great deal of suction, so be sure you're ready!
Pros: splash-proof; free of latex and phthalates; seven different modes
Cons: silicone, so not compatible with silicone-based lube; loud
Customer Review: "WHOA! This totally took me to a whole other level of solo play! My nipples were nice and sensitive and ready for anything. This is NOT for beginners and it gets intense but I was so hooked that I wound up using it 3 times the night I got it. I only stopped to give my nipples a rest (plus I exhausted myself lol). My only complaint is that it's noisy, but its a trade off for what it does. Don't pay attention to the negative reviews—I am particular and this is a WINNER! Worth every penny!!" -Lovehoney
According to reviews, these nipple clamps have just the right amount of give so that they can stay on without causing the wearer pain, and the optional vibrations provide the best added titillation (see what I did there?).
Pros: waterproof; easy to use; customizable pressure; latex-free; also safe to use on the clitoris, perineum, frenelum, and other erogenous zones
Cons: some users wish there were more vibration settings
Customer Review: "My previous partner was not into nipple play, so when my new partner asked me to stimulate her nipples, it was new to me. So, doing the research, these looked as if they would provide stimulation for longer and more intensely than I could. And so it proved to be: The intensity and length of her orgasms with these on and a suction vibrator on her clit is awesome to behold. Far more effective than the non vibrating slider style clamps we also bought to try out." -Lovehoney
Best Kinky Sex Toys for Couples
If you want to get a little kinky or think outside the box with a partner, you're not alone! And Dr. O'Reilly stresses the importance of divulging your fantasies to a partner, especially if your relationship with that person is also emotionally intimate. "These vulnerable conversations have the potential to deepen intimacy and connection," she tells us. As long as there's consent all around, there's nothing wrong with trying something new or spicing up your relationship!
If you're looking to try out some light bondage but aren't looking to risk physical discomfort, consider this soft, stretch-to-fit satin blindfold and restraints set in "very sensual and sexy" maroon.
Pros: three items for the price of one; soft; great for beginners; comfortable; easy to use
Cons: none found
Customer Review: "I'm very impressed with the Enchanted Starter Kit. Great color; very sensual and sexy." -Babeland
Make finger stimulation a little more interesting with these ribbed, textured toys. Dr. O'Reilly recommends using bare fingers as a starting point for all partner-on-partner stimulation in order to "determine where and what type of stimulation you and your partner might like," and progressing from naked fingers to toy-enclosed ones can be an excellent progression for those who enjoy ribbed and/or firm means of stimulation.
Pros: great for beginners; inclusive of all sexualities and anatomies; two toys for the price of one; free of phthalates; submersible; can be used on a number of different body parts; flexible
Cons: some users say they are too big for slender fingers
Customer Review: "I purchased these because I have extra long nails so when I am giving finger play it can sometimes feel uncomfortable & sharp. These rubber sleeves fit over my nails & reduce discomfort. You can also place these over mini silver bullets for extra fun." -Lovehoney
This firm, comfortable pillow is designed to support you when you and your partner need to adjust the angle for things to hit just right. It's also inconspicuous enough to blend into your bedroom decor when playtime's over. Described by customers as both firm and durable, this pillow is ready to weather all of your sexual adventures.
Pros: subtle; easy to use; can be used in many different ways; durable; soft fabric
Cons: none found
Customer Review: "The Pillo offers a little bit of lift, great for both you and your partner when going down! Definitely enjoyed!" -Dame
This unique bondage rope comes in fun colors so that it's as non-intimidating as possible, and the package even includes an instruction manual on how to tie comfortable, safe knots. One reviewer attests that the ropes feel great on skin, too, so you don't need to worry about chafing, scratching, or pulling. Just sit (or lay) back, relax, and have a great time.
Pros: soft; easy to use; long; versatile; easy to tie and untie; hypo-allergenic; comes with a knot-tying instruction manual
Cons: none found
Customer Review: "I'm stoked to have this be my first bondage rope. The colors are stunning and so expressive. The material is soft, yet super strong, and it's a great length so you have endless possibilities!" -Emojibator
For more, visit our Sexual Wellness section, where we unpack topics around consent, kink, sex toys, and more so you can have your safest and very best sexperiences yet.
Meet the Experts
Dr. O’Reilly is an award-winning sex and relationship expert. Through her company, Happier Couples Inc., she provides online and in-person relationship education to couples. She also works with corporate executives and business owners to help them form stronger professional relationships, and she has performed extensive research on making classroom-based sexual education more robust and accessible. In addition to working as an expert for Lovehoney, she is also featured on Global TV’s The Morning Show and PlayboyTV’s Swing, and co-hosts the Sex With Dr. Jess Podcast with her partner, Brandon Ware.
Ashton Egner is the Communication Manager at sex toy brand Kiiroo, which specializes in making high-tech sexual wellness for all genders, with special attention to sex toys for couples. Having studied at Erasmus University Rotterdam, she is currently based in the Netherlands.
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