What Do You Fake (Other Than Orgasms)?

Can you believe that I have faked an orgasm before? This is a clear case of the shoe is on the other foot. As I was growing up, the older guys told me I better not be a "two-minute" type of guy. It put so much fear into me that...

Can you believe that I have faked an orgasm before? This is a clear case of the shoe is on the other foot.

As I was growing up, the older guys told me I better not be a "two-minute" type of guy. It put so much fear into me. The last thing I wanted to do was leave any sexual partner unsatisfied. It immediately turned sex into a pass or fail situation. And, as you can tell from my 2.3 GPA at University of Delaware, I don't do well in a pass/fail situation very often.

Every time I have sex, I do everything I possibly can to not ejaculate too fast. This usually leads to ejaculation not happening.

Concentrating on not giving in, letting the mind wander to anything else other than how good the sex might be leads to bad sex. But, what if I let myself realize how good the sex is-I might just ejaculate too fast.

Trying too hard to ejaculate has a backward effect too. I've tried to concentrate really hard on "letting go" and it hasn't worked. It just adds to the pressure.

Now, the other end of this is that a girl often gets sore after about 45 minutes. I am no longer a stallion who can go for a long time, I'm just hurting the person. I don't want to be the ride operator who hears the poor kid fly by yelling "stop the ride, stop the ride", but I'm afraid I've been that guy before.



Roller coaster, Amusement ride, Terrestrial plant, Amusement park, Circle, Nonbuilding structure,

(Image credit: Archives)

I don't think a girl has ever faked an orgasm with me. I usually beat her to it by faking my own. Once the guy orgasms, the fun is always over-which is not really fair to the girl, but I guess that's the way biology wanted it to be.

Another reason I don't think a girl has ever faked an orgasm with me is because I don't think I've been good enough at sex to warrant that. Can you imagine a person pretending to get shot when there was no gun fire sound? I think any good fake orgasming girl knows where there's smoke there's fire. So, there has to be some evidence there for an orgasm to occur.

The most common things for a guy to fake are: wealth and confidence.

The only way I've ever been able to fake confidence is when I just act like I'm not into something. I don't call a girl back or I don't work too hard to get her to do something with me. This is a risky game to play though, because some girls will just get frustrated or confused. Faking confidence turns into game-playing. Also, when someone tries to put on an heir of confidence, they come off as overconfident and obnoxious.

Wealth is not so tough to fake until the credit card runs out. But I've heard of worse methods than credit cards. My friend once went on a date with a guy who was about to take her home to his "pricey Upper West Side" apartment. But, before they got there, he stopped the mission and said:

"Wait, we can't go to my place. My mom is crashing there tonight."

Turns out he lived with his mom.

My friend and I both decided life would be a lot easier for him if he just admitted to living with his mom because an Upper West Side apartment is impressive no matter who you live with.

Have you ever dealt with guys faking any of these things? For all you orgasm fakers, what's the right amount of time a guy should go before orgasm during sex? What sort of things have you faked in the dating world? Orgasms? Wealth? Confidence? Do they ever figure it out?