12 Signs We're All Socially Awkward

At work. At a party. In life.

Taylor Swift
(Image credit: Giphy)

1. You can't always control the volume of your voice. IF I HAD A NICKEL FOR EVERY TIME SOMEONE HAD TO SHUSH ME FOR ACCIDENTALLY SCREAMING AT THEM... okay so maybe I'm a little loud. Just tell me when to simmer and we're all good.

2. You wait until the next elevator so you don't have to make small talk with your boss. "So, uh, did you have a good weekend...?" Now, I have at least three things in my arsenal at any moment just in case we end up alone together.

3. You TMI when someone (read: not your mom or your BFF) asks how you are. People ask you this, not because they care, but because they are making small talk. I want to just say "good," or "well" but mostly it's,"I'm in a fight with my boyfriend because he doesn't get me, like really get me, you know? And I'm having stomach problems and maybe a fever and UGH I just feel so alone sometimes."

4. You have nightmares about having to maintain conversation with a hairstylist. Instead of asking about her day or recounting a funny night-out story, I'm all "Must. Read. Magazine. Now."

5. You'll hold off going to the bathroom to avoid passing your office crush. I'm not wearing my perfect outfit and my hair is on day three of this blow out. Either I'm going to get over it and talk to him or I'm going to move on because office fraternization is frowned upon anyway.

6. Your friend introduces you to someone and then immediately leaves to go to the bathroom. So much awkward staring, so much fake texting. Get it together and just compliment her hair already.

7. You want to leave the party and instead of saying proper goodbyes, you slip out while no one's looking. The circle of goodbye hugs is my nightmare. But again, I'm working on it.

8. You drink far too much coffee in anticipation for a big meeting and then forget to blink the whole time. It's time to switch to decaf and sip slowly.

9. You talk to your co-workers more on Gchat than in person. Sometimes talking to humans IRL is hard. I am a millenial afterall. (thumbs up emoji)

10. You constantly click those #NSFW links on the Internet and then conspicuously cover your screen. The shirtless pics of Ryan Gosling and the trailer for Nymphomaniac can wait until I'm on the couch.

11. You book your brazilian bikini wax at your desk. Everyone can hear you. Download this app to avoid this issue altogether.

12. You leave work and spot a colleague walking ahead of you. Immediately you slow your pace and alter your route. The 7-15 minute walk of pure and unwavering awkwardness is just not worth it.

Related Stories:


16 Signs You're the Worst Roommate Ever


10 Things You Should Never Say to a Fashion Girl


21 Types of Friends Everyone Has


12 Things That Definitely Still Make You Afraid

Photo Credit: Giphy

Follow Hallie Gould on Twitter.

Editor

Hallie has worked in beauty editorial for ten years and has been editorial director at Byrdie since 2021. Previously, she was a senior editor at Byrdie since 2016. During her time at Byrdie, she's written hundreds of high-performing stories on skincare, wellness (including fitness, diet, mental health, body image, et al) makeup, and hair. She's a regular on set, helping to source inspiration for makeup and hair looks, as well as interviewing celebrities, models, and other notable women and men in the beauty space.

Before that, Hallie ran Marie Claire's social media and wrote beauty and culture stories for the site, and helped launch Time Inc.'s digital-only beauty brand, MIMI. After college, she contributed to Time Out New York’s Shopping & Style section before landing her first beauty editor gig at Hearst's Real Beauty. Hallie's writing has also appeared in ELLE, Cosmopolitan, and InStyle. Hallie graduated with a BA in Communication Arts from the University of Wisconsin-Madison.

Latest in Culture
(l-r) Cara Kies, Lydia Blair, Chris Allen, Jaimi Alexander and Samantha Hubbard in episode 103 of Million Dollar Secret.
Where Is 'Million Dollar Secret' Filmed? What to Know About the Luxury Estate That Doubles As The Stag
A boy with a bruised face (Park Ji-hoon as Yeo Si-eun) stands in front of a blurred crowd, in 'Weak Hero Class 2.'
'Weak Hero Class 2': Everything We Know
Two men (Ike Barinholtz and Seth Rogen) sit at a conference table with a script in front of them, as two women (Kathryn Hahn and Chase Sui Wonders) stand behind them, in 'The Studio.'
The Cast of 'The Studio': Your Guide
(L to R) Contestants Kyle Wimberley, Lydia Blair, Samantha Hubbard, and Cara Kies sit and stand around a chess table in episode 105 of Million Dollar Secret.
Meet the Cast of 'Million Dollar Secret'
A man (Graham Hornigold) sits in a professional kitchen as a woman in a hat, sunglasses, and fur coat stands behind him, holding a champagne glass with her other hand on his shoulder. Concept art from the Netflix documentary 'Con Mum.'
Where Is Graham Hornigold Now? What We Know About the 'Con Mum' Subject
Owen Cooper as Jamie Miller in Adolescence.
Who Is Owen Cooper, the First-Time Actor Who Plays Jamie in 'Adolescence'?
Latest in Feature
three women with red white and blue nails
The Viral Blue Nail Theory Needs to Take a Seat
edible perfume brand amorecco
Edible Fragrances Are Trending—But Are They Actually Safe to Eat?
millie bobby brown in black with blonde hair
Millie Bobby Brown Chopped Her Hair Into a Blonde Bob
four women with bob haircuts
Now Is the Perfect Time to Embrace the Blunt Bob Trend
HA vs CaHA Fillers
What's the Difference Between HA and CaHA Fillers? Here's What You Need to Know
michelle monaghan in the mood
Michelle Monaghan Feels the Sexiest After an Underrated K-Beauty Ritual and $128 Body Moisturizer