Colton Underwood's 'The Bachelor' Trailer Involves Shirtlessnes and Tearful Escapes

The new trailer for The Bachelor is here, and everything about this trailer is NSFW. I mean, it opens with a shot of the ladytestants watching from afar as Colton Underwood, our resident Bachelor, takes an outdoor shower. There is much shrieking.

But what they're not going to do is let us forget that Underwood is a virgin. In fact, from the looks of the 90-second long trailer, it appears that the entire season is going to be one long virginity reference, because The Bachelor is known for nuance and approaching every topic with sensitivity. We're going to get 12 weeks of Chris Harrison trying to help a guy lose his virginity. But frankly, I never knew I needed Chris Harrison reminding a grown adult man that he could lose his virginity at any time until it was right there in front of me.

I am also applying for the position of Official Stan for the girl who says in the preview, "I haven't dated a virgin since I was 12." She says this to Colton's face! Like, she actually means it, and says so straight up! Oh my god! GET IT, GIRL. 

The best part of the trailer, though, involves Underwood threatening to leave the show and then literally hoisting himself over a fence to get away from all of the Bachelor shenanigans.  I've seen nearly every season of this show, and while Colton may not be the first virgin Bachelor (that title goes to Sean Lowe) he's definitely the first to try to GTFO there by literally jumping a fence. This, combined with the other dramatic moments from the trailer (uh, the girl saying she "can't accept a proposal"?) indicate nothing but drama, drama, drama from Underwood's time as El Bachelor. Every season says this will be the most dramatic season yet, but this time, it might be true.

Check out the trailer below—The Bachelor Season 23 premieres January 7, and I'll see you then for The Bachelor recaps right here on MarieClaire.com.

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