5 Leaving-for-a-Job-Interview Excuses You Should Never, Ever Use

"BRB, my, uh, grandma, uh, died."

Woman peeping over desk partition in office
(Image credit: Getty Images)

Much like a free Prada bag or George Clooney actually joining the cast of Downton Abbey, the ability to leave work for a job interview without having to lie about where you're going is pretty much a pipe dream. And it's one of those weird things: We all do it, it is OK, but getting caught is a nightmare the likes of which gives any working woman chills. 

So we've assembled five lame excuses that, no matter how masterfully delivered, will raise eyebrows, then questions, then hell. Don't get tangled up in these messes, we implore you.

1. "My cat Sir Cuddlesworth Fluffypuffs IV just died :("
This one's for the karma-defying souls who are just asking for it, cosmic payback-wise, but are also not considering the fact that one small Instagram slip-up down the road and your cover's blown. For good.

2. "TBH, I had a little too much fun at the happy hour, used a halal-cart Styrofoam tray as a pillow, and snored right through my alarm clock."
Isn't it kind of your responsibility as an employed, semi-grown person to get yourself places on time? The person who pays you to do that would certainly think so. 

3. "I have to get minor dental surgery. There will definitely be blood and maybe some gushing, but what do I care about staining my one good suit?"
And this is why everyone sticks with the standard, all-purposes "appointment." This is also why nine out of 10 experts at playing hooky—only for legitimate, professional reasons, we remind you—recommend that you stop dressing like a mid-aughties Olsen every now and then just to throw your coworkers off your scent.

4. "The, uh, heat's off in my apartment, and I have to wait here until the super comes. No, wait! I have lice! Yeah, that's it." 
Two lessons here: 1) Practice beforehand. 2) Stick to your guns. The most accomplished liar-liars lay groundwork, rehearse, and stay committed to their BS. So whatever you do, keep your facts straight and don't exhale gustily the minute you feel like you're safe—relief is a dead giveaway that interrogation experts have used to put away ax murderers. Truth. 

5. "You see, I've got this growth on my back that I've been meaning to check out because I looked it up, and WebMD said it might be a malignant tumor. But I thought it was just one of those 10-year-old cysts—have you seen that one video where the pus erupts and flows down in little rivulets? So gross! Anyway..."
Rule no. 1 of deception: Be vague. The more details, the more suspicious your boss becomes. P.S. As far as health excuses go, we hear UTIs have a weirdly high success rate.

You should also check out:

10 Excuses For When You're Ducking Out Of The Office For An Interview

10 Easy Ways You Can Be More Productive at Work

5 Ways to Work Better With Your Boss

Assistant Editor

Chelsea Peng is a writer and editor who was formerly the assistant editor at Marie Claire. She's also worked for The Strategist and Refinery29, and is a graduate of Northwestern University. On her tombstone, she would like a GIF of herself that's better than the one that already exists on the Internet and a free fro-yo machine. Besides frozen dairy products, she's into pirates, carbs, Balzac, and snacking so hard she has to go lie down.

Latest in Career advice
Image for
Meet the Millennial Women Buying Their Own Engagement Rings
WeNatal founders Ronit and Vida
How a Shared Fertility Struggle Empowered Two Ex-Nike Employees to Launch Their Own Prenatal Company
Illustration Art of two hands toasting with glasses of champagne. Gold chains are wrapped around the two glasses and on the chains, there are pendants resembling money, a car, and a house. The chain broke in the front and the pendants are dropping.
Are Millennials Secretly Rich?
Woman in a suit looking at a pile of money as more falls from the sky
They Got Everything They Wanted Professionally by 30. Then What?
Image of two women chatting, one is cut out.
Work Wives Are Going Extinct
TD Bank
5 Steps to Money Mindfulness
Latest in Feature
millie bobby brown in black with blonde hair
Millie Bobby Brown Chopped Her Hair Into a Blonde Bob
four women with bob haircuts
Now Is the Perfect Time to Embrace the Blunt Bob Trend
HA vs CaHA Fillers
What's the Difference Between HA and CaHA Fillers? Here's What You Need to Know
michelle monaghan in the mood
Michelle Monaghan Feels the Sexiest After an Underrated K-Beauty Ritual and $128 Body Moisturizer
a collage of book covers from the best true crime books
The 20 Best True Crime Books to Read in 2025
Sydney Cole Alexander as natalie smiling and posing in a lumon office in severance
'Severance' Is a Vintage Furniture Collector’s Fever Dream