Queen Latifah Isn’t Afraid to Be Controversial

Dana Elaine Owens, better known as Queen Latifah, has always had her hands full. A well-known rapper, singer, and actress, she began her career in the late '80s and hasn't stopped, having earned a Grammy, Golden Globe, Primetime Emmy, two NAACP Awards, and a SAG Award. However, the chronically busy superstar confesses that during her busy tenure, she's learned that the key to success is knowing when to balance work with rest.

"Sometimes, the best choice is taking a break and getting away from everyone, and just relaxing and enjoying myself and the way my mind thinks and my hobbies," she says. "Other times, of course, it's about creating something new that millions of people will see."

The 54 year old also uses her years of experience to guide her in finding that balance. For that reason, she says she's not afraid of aging—and even embraces it. Just this year, she was honored as a member of the QVC 50, a collection of 50 inspiring women over the age of 50 who embody the idea that they're in their "age of possibility"—a slogan that characterized 2024's QVC Summit, which was attended by the likes of Billie Jean King, Carla Hall, and Naomi Watts. When I spoke to the Newark, New Jersey native at the summit, she talked about her love for the term, explaining "Age of possibility means that everything is possible. Anything you put your mind to is still possible. It means I can continue to be as creative and free-thinking as I want to be, and that I can do whatever I want to do, even if that means deciding not to do so many things."

Ahead, the superstar details how she walks the tightrope between feeling active and overwhelmed. Plus, she advises on what to do when you've spread yourself too thin.

I'm always trying new things, letting people in a little bit, letting people know who I am. Of course, I don't have the nerves of 15-year-old me, and I have a lot more life experience than back then. But now I'm really just bringing my life experience to all the things that I've always wanted to do.

I like nature. For me, it's just getting in nature and looking up at the sky.

It's really about trying to be communicative, to protect yourself, and to not build a wall around yourself, but to really get to know your feelings and your cues. You know what I mean? Even though you just want to shower and go to bed, self-care might just be soaking in a nice warm, bath and taking care of yourself for a minute. Or it's dancing in your room to whatever song you didn't get to play all day around your kid, or it's watching whatever the heck you want—whatever mindless TV or, for me, sci-fi or whatever it is that I want to watch. Or it's sitting in the backyard and listening to nothing; sitting on the porch and listening to the sounds of the outdoors, of crickets, and whatever sounds of nature that are happening that night. Or it's just looking up in the sky and decompressing.

Music is a quick pick-me-up. I'll play my favorite song, or any song. It could be one of my favorite rock songs. It could be a ratchet, filthy song that you can't play around anybody. It could be a gospel song, to swing in a whole different direction. Music is the quickest wellness hack for me. I can play any song. It just clears the space in my mind and takes me somewhere emotional if I'm feeling numb. Because people forget you can be numb, too. You get in the habit of numbing your feelings. Sometimes you want to feel, and as an actor, you have to feel. For example, when I have a crying scene, am I able to cry? If I can't, I'm cutting my emotions off.

I really just want to call all my girls—especially those of us who are 50 years old and up—and get back into our rhythm of talking to each other again. We haven't had a girl's trip to Vegas in a year, so I want to link with my sisters, who know me and I know them, and we can just be ourselves and just boost each other up. We can give each other that strength that we need to remember our sexy, fly, creative selves who are capable of so much sh*t. And we can't forget that.

I live for the thrill of things. I like to be in a place where I feel a little bit scared because it makes me feel alive and I'm also learning something. I'm learning something about me, and I'm learning something about what I'm made of, and I'm learning something about something else that I've never experienced before.

My father always told me that replying "no" is as strong as saying "yes." It is very challenging to set those boundaries and hold the line with them, so I try to hit the middle with that, but I remember that a no is as strong as a yes. Sometimes, you also have to say yes to things that you may have wanted to say no to for whatever reason, but letting go and going for it is fun.

It might just be some sound healing or something I can turn on and listen to. It could be a yoga class—something that's helping me to breathe.

I feel it's a year of yes for me, because I feel really strong this year. Despite what's happening in the world and even with our elections and these new laws, I feel very hopeful, because I talked to my grandmother who's about to be 96 years old and who has seen a lot, and she's like, "Hey, you got to take the bitter with the sweet in life–and just when one door closes, another one opens." And I believe her. So I'm not going to let whatever's happening politically right now dissuade me from being hopeful about the future, being strong in my spot, and feeling like I can speak whenever I have something to say.

If I have an opinion, I have an opinion. Or if I don't need to say anything, I don't need to say anything. I mean, I'm definitely going to speak at the ballot box, but in the meantime, I listen to what people have to say, because the problem is we haven't been listening to each other often, so everybody's just dug their heels in. But you're talking to someone who's lived her life in shades of gray—I don't feel comfortable being on one side or the other. It feels like a box to me. And I think that allows me to be around people with different opinions and hear where they're coming from.

Gratitude makes me get out of my own mind and think about someone else. Being grateful or being of service to someone else. Doing something for someone else for a second, something nice. It's easy. It's can just be complimenting someone or doing something small to make someone else's life easier. It gets you out of your own head a little bit, making someone else's day.

Music is always an escape for me. Music is my home. My home planet, I think.

Always saying "yes!" Saying "yes" is important, but I've said "yes" many times throughout my life to my own detriment, to the point where I had literally cellular burnout from working too hard and doing too many things and not stopping to acknowledge my feelings. I was just getting to a point where I would have to step away and disappear. And my mom was the only person who knew.

Years ago, I made it my mission to take a month off every summer, because I realized I was not functioning the way I should. I needed help. I was going through challenges and I couldn't work and do everything I needed to do to fix myself and work on myself. I needed to be taken care of in a different way.

I'd also say there's nothing wrong with asking for help. We need help sometimes. We are conditioned to think we don't, but that's not real. Especially being a caregiver of my mom at one point, I realized that was not something that just one person could do. I realized, "We need to all become a part of this. We need to share schedules. I need professionals to talk to me and explain how this goes." Sometimes, it was that someone else needed to work so I could just be a daughter that day. Because going through those challenges and being fairly helpless in the sense that I couldn't cure my mother was traumatizing.

Sometimes, you've got to just say, "This is doing me in. I can't carry this. I'm falling and I need some help getting back up." So that's what I did, and that's what I do. Sometimes, I just have to get away and get into a space where I can find my authentic self again and find tools to help me cope for when the times are tough and I can't step away.