Help! My Boyfriend Doesn't Want to Have Sex!

Do you have a question for Logan? Email her at AskLogan@MarieClaire.com.

Q: “My partner is never interested in having sex with me. We could have sex once a month and that would be more than enough for him. And he only has sex with me more than that because he knows I want to, not because he ever wants to. Whenever I try to confront him about how unusually low his sex drive is, he just says that's how he always has been and that nothing is wrong. To me, it just seems like if he really loved me, he would want to have sex with me. I don't know what to think.”

A: First, keep in mind that love and desire are two different things altogether. You can love your partner and have a low libido. Sometimes this can be due to hormonal imbalances, stress, body image issues, and so on. Sexual desire is as much mental as it is physical; it is impossible to separate the two. If he is truly uninterested, and you think that there may be something else going on, perhaps you should suggest that you both see a therapist, together. But try not to make it solely “his" issue; in other words, don’t make him feel like there is something wrong with him. Sex (and mismatched desire) is a relationship issue, not just about one partner.

Do you have a question for Logan? Email her at AskLogan@MarieClaire.com.