What Dad Really Wants For Father's Day

You can repay the guy who gave you unconditional love, wisdom, and college tuition by buying him last-minute rubbish - or you might consider getting him one of these:

iPhone When he gets frustrated by it, you get a free iPhone. Win-win.

Custom suit by Seize sur Vingt While he’s trying it on, burn his flip-flops, cargo pants, and Steely Dan T-shirt.

Panasonic’s 150-inch plasma TV Toss in a Sopranos box set and watch Dad weep like a little girl.

Uniden MapTrax Navigation System Instead of refusing to get directions from strangers, now Dad can refuse to get directions from a state-of-the-art gadget.

Grandkids Not yours. Somebody else’s.

Need some more ideas?
Check out Esquire's list of the best gifts for dads.