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August 19, 2008 10:58 AM by Dorothy Allred Solomon | COMMENTS
Sometimes as I write these blog posts, I fear that I'm losing my sense of humor. But it's really hard to find much that's funny about fundamentalism once you get past the jeans and tennis shoes under prairie dresses, and the stiff, sugar-watered hair, and the long underwear and tight stockings worn in summer desert heat. The costumes do make one think of Shakespeare's Malvolio overdressed in yellow tights, attempting to convince his intended of his nobility.
But so much about the FLDS situation is desperate and dismal and perverse. When I try to find fun, I feel cynical and cavalier. To be satirical is to heap further mortification on people whose dignity has become threadbare.
I long to rove into other spheres of fundamentalism and laugh about the time the wives fought over my father's shirts. Well, they didn't actually fight. One wife would steal his shirts from another wife's home so that my father would have to bathe or shower at the "thief's" home, where he would also stay for breakfast. This clandestine rivalry led to some slapstick-my father grimacing as he raced across the graveled yard between houses in his bathrobe and bare feet, looking for his clothes.
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August 18, 2008 12:30 PM by Jessica Henderson | COMMENTS
If you saw me stumble sleepily to my desk this morning, you might have wondered, "Somebody hit the happy hour hard...".
Nope, more like Olympic overload. Every night this week I've been up to the wee hours getting my fix of Michael Phelps, international scandal (how old are those girls?), and that wicked balance beam. At midnight on Wednesday I glanced at the clock and once again promised myself...just.. one...more..event, then off to bed. Instead, I woke up on my couch at 5 AM, contacts super-glued to my eyeballs, and Bob Costas droning on in the background. I shuffled off to my room with a crick in my neck-but not before I set my lifepartner (aka DVR) for the following night's events. In between events, I soak up the min-bios that either endear you to an athlete more (one mention of a dedicated mom and it's water works for me) or leave you utterly befuddled (Lochte: the grill, the drawings? Some things are best left kept to oneself). Those individual all-around gymnastics finals last week? Sure, it was after 1 in the morning and I had work early the next day but if Mary freakin' Lou Retton is in the house, then so am I. (This also holds true for her Perdue Chicken cooking demonstrations at the mall.) The agony, the ecstasy...this is must see TV the likes of which NBC hasn't been able to pull off since Clooney checked out of the ER and Central Perk kicked those overly-coiffed Friends kids out.
Now that Phelpsie has all eight medals, I can sleep at night again. Then again, maybe not (Hello, track & field!). For now, I'm captivated. The Olympics are ingrained in my day-to-day life: I secretly size up the wingspan of the tall gentleman standing next to me (he could take Piersol but probably not Lochte), score commuter's dismount from the train in the morning (stick your landing people!) and synchronize my tong movements with the unsuspecting diners at the cafeteria salad bar. Maybe an intervention is in order, but one things for sure-the Olympics aren't just exhausting for the athletes competing-this is one spectator sport that takes it's own kind of endurance.
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August 18, 2008 9:26 AM by Cleo Glyde | COMMENTS
Genital augmentation? Pastie scars? Dwarfs? Margaret Cho, star of a new VH-1 reality series, The Cho Show, and a touring burlesque act, gets intimate with us.
Q: What makes your series unique?
A: My life is anything but typical. My show features my very Korean parents, my very gay friends, and my wonderful assistant—who also happens to be a little person. So it's like a cross between my stand-up specials and Madonna's Truth or Dare, with a bit of Little People, Big World mixed in.
Q: How did your family react to the show's cringe-worthy fare—like when you injected collagen into your G-spot?
A: My parents are very funny when they have to deal with anything racy or off-color. They usually pretend they don't speak English.
Q: What should women know about your burlesque show, Beautiful?
A: I'm exploring how we feel about our bodies through laughter. It's important to feel beautiful; it's political to feel beautiful. All my life I felt awkward, insecure, and chubby.
Q: Now you strip onstage. And once you started dancing, you shed pounds. What happened?
A: It's weird. Discovering burlesque led me to take up belly dancing, and a lot of my weight came off. It's a pleasurable movement that has positively increased my body awareness. It's so unlike going to the gym and hating it.
Q: How long do you plan to shimmy?
A: Burlesque is fun, but now I have big circular scars on my breasts from wearing pasties every night, so soon I'm going to have to take a semi-retirement.
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August 18, 2008 8:14 AM by Dorothy Allred Solomon | COMMENTS
"What luck for the rulers that men do not think." -Adolf Hitler
The beleaguered members of the FLDS Church may be gradually awakening to the costs-in real, monetary terms-of being led by corrupt leaders. In recent months, people who lost their homes and families, and those who lost their innocence, have brought suit against the FLDS Church. A board appointed to handle the allocation of settlements and judgments has sold the Harker Ranch, which once grew many of the crops used to feed the FLDS members. And trustee Bruce Wisen announced plans to assess a monthly fee on FLDS homes-those who refuse risk eviction. But many of these people live in homes built by their grandparents and great-grandparents on land that long ago was purchased and developed by their families. These people probably assumed that their tithes and offerings were being used to maintain FLDS property and to insure their own security along with that of their children. Instead, it seems that the tithes paid by the FLDS members may actually be used to subsidize their leaders' perversion and greed.
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August 15, 2008 2:11 AM by Dorothy Allred Solomon | COMMENTS
Somewhere in my mind, the definitions of "stubborn" and "fundamentalist" have merged. I watch the news and notice that even after losing their children for two months in the YFZ raid, some mothers are more committed to being stubborn than they are to keeping their children. Two women married to Merrill Jessop may lose their children to foster homes if they don't cooperate with the court by signing an agreement to keep their children out of harm's way. The "harm" consists of the children's exposure to men who may force them into an early marriage-in other words, underage sexual assault. It seems these women care more about supporting men who think it's ok to abuse young girls in the name of religion than they do about the well being of their own children. Such blind loyalty and stubborn steadfastness can't be seen as devotion. Can it?
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August 14, 2008 3:21 PM by Yael Kohen | COMMENTS
Michael C. Hall isn't as creepy as he seems
Dexter Morgan feels no guilt when sneaking up behind his victims, stabbing them with a hypodermic needle, and using a power saw to take them apart, limb from bloody limb. So what is it about Dexter, Showtime's acclaimed series now premiering its third season, that makes the gruesome murderer so damn endearing?
For one thing, there's Michael C. Hall, whose grin, strong jaw, and easygoing demeanor--in all those scenes where he isn't dismembering someone--make it possible to see beyond the violence. Funny, we hadn't fully appreciated his good looks when he played type-A mortician David Fisher on HBO's Six Feet Under.
It's strange how the psychopathic murderer role raises fewer eyebrows than did the one on Six Feet Under, in which he played a repressed homosexual. "I do get a sense that many family members of mine are more comfortable watching me simulate murder than simulate a same-sex relationship with a black man," says Hall, a Raleigh, NC, native. "I got a lot more questions then about, 'Is it weird playing a gay character?' than I now get about, 'Is it weird playing a serial killer?'"
Not that spending so much time surrounded by corpses isn't creepy. Says Hall, "It's an occupational hazard that you take your work home with you"--exacerbated by the fact that he's currently dating Jennifer Carpenter, the actress who plays his foster sister on Dexter. "I totally have dreams that I might not have had otherwise. But I like the idea that on some unconscious level, there's an intersection between my dream life and the life simulated through work, you know? That's the fun of it." Sure, sounds killer.
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August 14, 2008 10:55 AM by Dorothy Allred Solomon | COMMENTS
Recently, one of my insightful friends wrote, "I got thinking about polygamy and how interesting it was that the saints were commanded to live that principle over a hundred years ago and not today. Honestly, I think it would really go over well today, since more and more marriages are seen as 'open' and fidelity is optional." She mentioned that the early Latter-day Saints considered polygamy a hardship, while people today struggle with monogamy.
My friend points up the polygamous character of our culture, although people in the mainstream don't generally commit to polygamous relationships as fundamentalists claim to do. According to recent polls, women in America are almost as likely as men to engage in extramarital relationships-over sixty percent of them. Roughly two out of three marriages are headed for divorce and thus, serial polygamy. And many people will remain uncommitted and unmarried, finding sexual and romantic partners in a 'catch as catch can' style. The question hovers: which way of life breeds a stronger nest for shoring up the character of the relationship and the children born into the relationship? The time for a responsible, penetrating, and authentic study of polygamy by choice versus "accidental" polygamy is upon us.
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August 13, 2008 12:15 PM by Dorothy Allred Solomon | COMMENTS
A coalition has been formed in the small Colorado community of Westcliffe, located near the Bull Domingo Ranch where a group of FLDS members have taken refuge. The coalition's action committee, called "Step Up," has invited several FLDS detractors, beginning with Laurie Allen. Allen's vitriolic Banking On Heaven video paints the FLDS to look like the violent and crazy LeBaron group into which she was born and raised. "Step Up" has enthusiastically engaged in educating themselves about their FLDS neighbors by reading books by Stephen Singular, Carolyn Jessop, and Jon Krakauer--all vehement critics of the FLDS people and their way of life.
Gathering evidence to prove you are right about a preconceived conclusion doesn't result in real education. Rather, it breeds prejudice and creates intolerance. A one-sided "education" could be better termed "propaganda" because it doesn't present both sides of the story and because the information flows from sources who have a fixed position and agenda. I have a question for the good people of Westcliffe: Why not walk down the road, knock on the door of the Steed residence, introduce yourself, and have a real conversation? Your FLDS neighbors will likely learn as much from an authentic encounter as you will. The best education is the one you experience first-hand.
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August 12, 2008 3:12 PM by Thelma Adams | COMMENTS
WHY SHE'S ON OUR RADAR: The 31-year-old seasoned thesp plays a newlywed whose interracial marriage inflames her nutty neighbor (Samuel L. Jackson) in the suburban thriller Lakeview Terrace.
HER SHTICK: Regal, self-possessed, and straight-A-smart, she makes concertos of second-fiddle roles opposite Oscar-winning costars like Forest Whitaker in The Last King of Scotland and Jamie Foxx in Ray.
GIRL JUST WANTS TO HAVE FUN: Washington says those who know her best characterize her as "driven, compassionate--and playful."
DADDY'S GIRL: She inherited her sense of humor from her pops. "He looks for the joy in life. He's very gregarious. My dad has never met a stranger."
QUEEN MUM: "Mom's the opposite," says Washington. "She's the epitome of grace--as a person, and as a woman of color. She's very cerebral. She taught me about walking with dignity in the world."
ALPHA DOG: Having split from fiancé David Moscow last year, Washington bunks in L.A. with her shih tzu--Yorkie mix. "She knows I'm talking about her," she says, as "Josephine Baker" crawls into her lap.
BRONX BABY: Washington attended tony Manhattan prep school Spence, yet remains faithful to her home 'hood: "Any musicologist will tell you hip-hop was born in the '70s in the Bronx. So was I. I appreciate having grown up there in the age of hip-hop as much as I appreciate having graduated from George Washington University with honors."
GRRRL POWER: "I sit on the board of V-Day, an organization that wants to end violence against women and girls. Our mission is to put ourselves out of business! Women are our most precious resource. We all come from a woman."
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August 12, 2008 11:56 AM by Dorothy Allred Solomon | COMMENTS
The Associated Press repor
ted that Kelly Fischer has appealed his conviction of sexual conduct with a minor. One of the "Colorado City Eight" prosecuted for taking underage teens as plural wives, Fischer claims that his religious freedoms-which are protected under the 1st and the 14th Amendments-have been violated because Arizona law prohibits the practice of plural marriage. But the appeals court upheld the original decision and stipulated that people have "the right to believe and profess whatever religious doctrine they wish, but no absolute right" to live their beliefs. Invoking an 1878 precedent, the ruling judge stated, "Conduct remains subject to regulation for the benefit of society." The judge also noted that Arizona law constitutionally prohibits sexual activity with a minor-regardless of the minor's consent.
In other words, you have the right to believe anything you want and you have the right to talk about it freely, but you don't necessarily have the right to carry out what you believe. I, for one, am grateful that people who believe in human sacrifice don't have permission to perform sacrifices. And I sure don't think pedophiles should be able to cry "religious freedom" as an excuse for sexually abusing little girls-even if the little girls say they want to be abused.
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August 11, 2008 1:16 PM by Dorothy Allred Solomon | COMMENTS
Warren Jeffs gets love letters in his prison cell, some of them written by the young girls he married-twelve, thirteen, fourteen years old. It's pathetic and a little nauseating to think of a pretty young woman wiling her tender life away with dreamed-up concoctions of celestial bliss with a convicted felon. Yet the desires of fundamentalist girls aren't too different from the fantasies of other young women, who are notoriously dreamy in adolescence. Such has been the subject of novels and plays throughout literary history: Romeo and Juliet, Kathy and Heathcliff in Wuthering Heights, Maria and Tony in West Side Story. As long as Warren Jeffs is beyond reach-whether in a prison cell or in a grave-fusty, fickle reality can't interfere with the pristine ideal.
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August 8, 2008 12:41 PM by Dorothy Allred Solomon | COMMENTS
Psychologists point out that the opposite of love is not hate, it's
apathy. Indifference seems anathema to the bonds of caring that we
call love. In a big family, the potential for more affection can
result in a greater sense of security, a higher incidence of fond
expressions, and generally more love to go around. But when insecurity
prevails, the potential for apathy increases. Just as FLDS followers
can distance themselves from their neighbors and wholly discount the
"wicked world," they can also insulate themselves from each other.
Warren Jeffs has proven his willingness to hack away family bonds and
excommunicate lifelong FLDS members at his whim.
READ MORE 
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August 8, 2008 12:00 AM by Unknown | COMMENTS
THE PLOT: A group of evangelicals have descended on sex-ed teacher Ruth Ramsey's Northeast town, and now the 41-year-old divorced mother of two is forced to teach a dubious abstinence curriculum; meanwhile, her daughters--one a star soccer player--want to join the church. Add to that her strange attraction to acolyte Tim Mason, and you have a perfect storm of suburban psychodrama.
LUCY(EXECUTIVE EDITOR): Perrotta kills two birds with one stone, writing a novel and the inevitable screenplay all in one.
YAEL(ASSOCIATE EDITOR): I had Tina Fey cast as Ruth from the first scene, when she walked down the hall of the high school with a latte.
LEA(FEATURES EDITOR): Yeah, I've never read a Tom Perrotta book before, and this was lighter than I anticipated. I didn't hate it, but the story felt a little dated to me, like, we had this conversation about prayer in schools maybe 15 years ago.
LUCY: But I think Perrotta is good at locating the tensions that threaten everything you thought was in place--in Little Children, it was a pedophile in Stepford suburbia, and in this book, it's sex-ed in the land of competitive girls' soccer. On the one hand, the subject matter for both books seems too obvious to be even remotely engaging, and yet in both cases Perrotta nails it. These are the things people fear, that overshadow their perfect life.
SHYEMA(ASSOCIATE RESEARCH EDITOR): My first thought when I started reading was, Perrotta is a liberal pushing an agenda. That it was going to be all these "normal" people against the "fanatics." But once he really gets into Tim's story, that he's this recovering druggie who turns to the church, you got an extra layer there.
LEA: I thought his take on religion was very heavy-handed. That scene where Ruth's kids go to church with one of the families in the community, and the parents are taking pictures of Ruth's kids all dressed up, was a bit over the top. I imagine going to church on a Sunday can be a mundane ritual for many people--just a commitment they have that they don't break, and it doesn't come with all the religious fervor.
LUCY: The thing Perrotta does quite well is get into the mind of a woman. When Ruth is watching one of her daughter's soccer games, he writes, "Watching them, Ruth felt a sharp pang of envy . . . wishing she'd grown up at a time when sports were a routine part of a girl's life. She would be a happier person now, she was pretty sure of it." That struck me as an incredibly genuine lament of a woman of a certain age.
YAEL: Or when he writes: "Later, after Tim left, she realized--though maybe it was less a matter of realizing than of being able to admit it to herself--that she'd secretly been hoping to find herself enmeshed in one of those corny 'opposites attract' narratives that were so appealing to writers of sitcoms and romantic comedies." What single woman doesn't think that?
SHYEMA: So who would play Tim?
LEA: That guy from Thirtysomething, with the long hair and the scruffy beard. Peter Horton. Did I just date myself?
NEXT MONTH: The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Díaz (Riverhead)
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August 7, 2008 1:55 PM by Dorothy Allred Solomon | COMMENTS
I've been reading Stephanie Meyer's Twilight series, where a young woman falls in love with a vampire and has to deal with the prejudices of the general public about the undead. We humans are so intolerant! :) I think of Hamlet's warning to his friend, "There more things between Heaven and Earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy." Remember, this is "the dawning of the Age of Aquarius." We live in an era of secret worlds revealed, when even the primitive tribes of the Amazon, hidden for millennia, can be viewed on television screens everywhere. How predictable then, that the "peculiar people" who believe that God wants them to practice plural marriage would have their lives advertised on the tube and in print throughout the world. Whether we like it or not, we live in the prophesied time when our secret lives are "shouted from the rooftops:" the Information Age. As with the famous apple, and all knowledge, whether we use the information for good or ill is up to us.
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August 6, 2008 1:47 PM by Dorothy Allred Solomon | COMMENTS
What goes around comes around--even if you don't believe in karma. In the beautiful Creston Valley in British Columbia, Canada (where Teressa Wall Blackmore raised her children) a split occurred in the polygamous community some years ago. Longtime "Bishop of Bountiful" Winston Blackmore had gathered a loyal following that must have been threatening to Warren Jeffs. Jeffs replaced Winston with a more malleable bishop, one he could count on not to upstage him. But Bishop Winston wasn't willing to be undermined. Half the FLDS community insisted on upholding him as their leader. Those who remained loyal to Warren Jeffs continued going to the FLDS school, but would not allow the "Winstonites" to attend.
Now, years later, Warren Jeffs' self-serving decision has come back on him--like many other decisions he allegedly made (especially the decision to force underage girls into marriages of his choosing). The FLDS school board may soon be relieved of their responsibilities by court-appointed trustee Bruce Wisan. The reason? The Canadian government funds the FLDS school with hundreds of thousands of dollars each year. Since half the community of Bountiful (the Winston Blackmore half) is barred from attending the FLDS school, the school board is violating basic rules of public education. So, Warren Jeffs' FLDS board of education special-cased itself right out of the picture. Karma does catch up--even if you don't believe in karma.
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August 5, 2008 5:17 PM by Dorothy Allred Solomon | COMMENTS
Typically, fundamentalist polygamists have tried to keep themselves
exempt from the ways of "the wicked world." But the alleged crimes of
polygamous patriarchs have eroded their insular world, placing
polygamists under scrutiny. And patriarchs have retaliated. In the
past week, a series of controversies have proved that polygamists can
sling mud with the most seasoned politicians. When FLDS apostate Dan
Fischer testified against his former sect before the Senate Judiciary
Committee, sect attorneys filed fourteen affidavits from his children
and his former plural wives accusing Fischer of lies, non-support, and
abuse.
READ MORE
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August 4, 2008 10:51 AM by Dorothy Allred Solomon | COMMENTS
People keep asking me how plural wives live together without getting in
each other's way. "I'd beat up a woman who messed with my house," said
one woman. "No telling what I'd do if she went to bed with my husband!"
No
wonder the mainstream woman is puzzled by videos of FLDS sisterwives
embracing each other, comforting each other, and walking arm-in-arm.
No wonder she disbelieves a woman in her fifties who promises to
cherish her husband's teen bride-one she'll have to teach "the ropes"
of motherhood. Why don't too many cooks spoil the broth in polygamous
households?
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